Warehouse Party
by fashionablenerd
Summary: When Claudia gets left alone on her 21st birthday, she decides to throw herself a party in the Warehouse and hi-jinks ensue.
1. Chapter 1

Claudia pulled her fuzzy purple shrug hoodie over her head and shook her short auburn hair out of her face. Her honey brown eyes shone with excitement as she swiped mascara over her eyelashes. Bouncing over to her dresser, she dug through her sock drawer until she found a matching pair of black and purple knee highs. After lacing the rainbow laces on her shiny black Doc Marten boots, Claudia smoothed down the one skirt she owned to make sure she wouldn't be flashing anyone in the near future. Flinging open the door of the room she claimed as her own at Leena's Bed and Breakfast, she nearly tripped over her feet while rushing down the stairs.

"Happy 21st birthday to me!" Claudia exclaimed as she burst into the breakfast nook as Agents Pete and Myka stooped behind Artie to be included in the Farnsworth call to Steve. "Who's ready to party...?"

Claudia's question trailed off as her smile faded. The three blank stares she was receiving from her friends told her that they would not be partying tonight.

"Oh, Claudia we got a ping..."

"There's an artifact in Georgia that's..."

"Claude, I'm sorry but..."

Each half sentence filled with more sympathy and regret than the first, the trio of agents all started moving at the same time trying to get around each other to awkwardly hug the birthday girl and promise to call when they landed. Artie paused at the doorway to look back at the crest fallen Claudia and started to say something when she shook her head and brushed past him.

"But I even wore a skirt," Artie heard Claudia mutter as she stomped back up the stairs.

* * *

When Claudia heard the front door of the B&B click shut, signaling the exit of Pete, Myka, and Artie, she emerged from her room and sat down on the top stair in a huff. After a minute of staring daggers into the door at the bottom of the stairs, an idea began to form. Claudia's back slowly straightened out of her slouch as a smile bloomed across her face.

"Who says I can't still have a party," she asked herself while grabbing the keys to the Oldsmobile and slammed the door behind her.

* * *

Claudia skipped through the Warehouse with the golden bottomless cookie jar ("Because who doesn't love cookies?") under one arm, and a pair of silver and black headphones that had once belonged to Wolfman Jack "Unlimited concerts? Dude!") under the other. The clicking of Trailer's toe nails followed the young woman as she weaved her way through the aisles until she came upon an orange crushed velvet sofa. Spotting a goblet on the shelf with a decorative grape vine carved in a lazy spiral, she grabbed it and flung herself across the sofa with Trailer following suit. Just as the first notes of 'I'll be there for you' started emanating from within the couch, Claudia shoved the headphones over her ears and thought really hard about the Wembley Stadium Queen concert of 1986.

Popping the top of the cookie jar and activating the goblet so it filled with wine, Claudia closed her eyes and relaxed into the sofa. As she sipped from Dionysus' wine goblet, swearing to put the goblet away after 2 refills, her mind quieted as Freddy Mercury's legendary voice filled her ears. Distracted by the calming effects of the wine, and the music flowing from the headphones, it wasn't until she felt her heart grow heavy that she realized she had passed her 2 refill stopping point. Cursing the duel personalities of the wine god ("Why did I think that goblet was a good idea?"), she figured one more refill couldn't hurt at this point. Trailer's sharp bark penetrated the head phone's musical capabilities and Claudia sighed as she pulled them off and finally set aside the goblet. She slid off the sofa in order to cut off the lyrics still radiating from the innards of the cushions. Reaching for the steaming mug of coffee that seemed to be calling her name, she stared down into the rich brown concoction before shrugging and bringing the cup to her lips.

"Ahh... liquid bliss."

Leaning back into the sofa and letting the coffee counteract the alcohol in her system, she absentmindedly stroked the fur down Trailer's back while letting her mind wander. After an indeterminate amount of time, she felt the caffeine begin to sing in her blood, and her limbs twitched with the urge to move. Pushing herself into a standing position while attempting to avoid the singing sofa, she grabbed her Farnsworth from the coffee table ("When did I take that out?") and made her way down an aisle in search of something that would lift her spirits.

"C'mon Trailer, let's go find some trouble."

Upon reaching a white door with a gold star mounted at eye level, she couldn't resist turning the knob and peering inside the inky black room. When nothing happened, she tentatively raised her foot, thrust it into the room and waved it around to make sure there weren't any motion sensitive defense mechanisms.

"Not my smartest idea… good thing there weren't any.. zoinks!" Claudia yelped as lights popped on into life and revealed what could only be a dressing room.

"Oh.. my.. god." Trailing her fingers across the fabric of dozens of dresses, jackets, slacks, and other various pieces of clothing, her spirits indeed lifted when her hand stopped at a length of vibrant red cloth. Lifting it off the plush hanger, she almost squealed in delight when she spotted a golden emblem in the shape of a S. Ignoring Trailer's whine of protest, she swept the cape across her shoulders and tied it around her neck. She strode out of the dressing room, paused for a moment with her chest puffed out and her hands on her hips, then punched her fist into the air.

Trailer watched as Claudia shot into the air with a shriek, and promptly crashed to the ground 3 aisles away. The dog got off his haunches to investigate when his human companion whooshed over his head with a warning shout fading as she flew farther away.

"Trailer! Never drink and flyyyyyy…!"


	2. Chapter 2

When Claudia finally returned to the dressing room, she was walking with a slight limp and was dragging the crimson cape behind her along the ground where it was quickly gathering dust.

"Okay, solo birthday party didn't start off so great," she mumbled as she shook out dust bunnies and hung the blasted cape back on the racks of clothing. She ran her fingers through her hair in an attempt to comb out the tangles, retied her boot laces, and spied a familiar khaki short sleeve shirt. Finding the tag, she confirmed her suspicions and quickly shrugged into the shirt. When she heard Trailer's quiet snuffling near the shoe section on the other side of the room she crouched behind the rack, parted the hanging clothing just wide enough to peer through.

"Crikey, a rare wild collie!" Claudia began inching along the wall, still in her crouch, narrating her actions in a mock whisper, as she slowly approached the canine. "Now, this is the first time we've ever spotted this majestic creature in it's natural habitat. Watch as he hunts his next meal, the might soled sandals of the Sahara."

Trailer's ears pricked forward and he looked toward the talking clothes racks. Taking a step towards the voice, the dog cocked his head in confusion.

"Watch out, his incredible hearing has detected us! Now's my only chance," Claudia got into position just to the right of the dog, "I'm just going to.. give this mighty creature... a mighty.. tummy tickle!" Claudia launched herself out of the racks at Trailer, who yelped and scrabbled to get away from the attacking human. She wrapped her arms around the canine and rolled him so his belly was exposed. When he realized he was getting a belly rub of epic proportion, he relaxed and his tongue lolled out of his mouth in a happy grin.

* * *

With a skip in her step, Claudia returned to the aisles with Trailer following closely. After narrowly missing several artifacts, she paused and shook out her arms and legs.

"Trailer, remind me never to drink again. Gonna have one hell of a birthday hangover tomorrow."

Skimming the shelves around her, Claudia's gaze halted when she spotted an item sitting among the artifacts.

"How did this get here?" She plucked the bobble head resembling one head of Global Dynamic, Douglas Fargo, off of the shelf and softly smiled. Shaking her head, she placed the figure back on the shelf, "Feelings and alcohol, not a good mix."

As she turned to walk away, she failed to notice that the bobble head was sitting on top of a small disc of reflective metal, and the iridescent stones encircling it began to glow. The stones flashed brilliantly before it faded dark once more.

"Ooooo, Vincent Van Gogh's straw hat!"

* * *

A thousand miles again, said Douglas Fargo was just stepping out of his shower. Wrapping a towel around his waist, he noticed his PDA was blinking, signalling a message. As he picked up the phone, he felt his skin begin to tingle and his vision was filled with a blinding white light. His stomach dropped, and he reached out for his bathroom counter to steady himself, but he hand collided with a metal shelf.

"What…" Fargo's sight slowly came into focus, and he spun slowly as he took in his surroundings. His eye widened and his mouth tensed into a small "O" as he realized where he was.

"Hello?" Doug's voice echoed across the Warehouse. As goosebumps spread down his neck, he looked down with a grimace. "I'm naked.."

* * *

Watching as small strokes of color swirled around her, Claudia drifted along randomly, following the twists and turns of the painted world that only she could see. Rounding a turn, she laughed to herself as she saw a figure in the middle of the aisle.

"Now I know I'm still drunk. That looks like Fargo," taking in his appearance, she smirked, "a naked Fargo."

Doug froze as he watched a stumbling Claudia, hands reaching out in front of her, slowly come towards him. He bit his lip as he waited for the girl in front of him, wearing a floppy straw hat and a very short skirt, to become aware of the situation. When her wandering hands collided with his chest, she hesitated before they traveled to his shoulders up to his neck, patting his skin as if she didn't quite believe what she was feeling. When a hand tentatively smacked his face, he made a sound of protest.

Jolting back, Claudia ripped the hat from her head and stared at him. He waved nervously at her while she opened and closed her mouth, attempting to form words.

"There's a naked Fargo in the Warehouse," she finally blurted, "Why is there a naked Fargo in the Warehouse?"

"Um.." He could feel her gaze flit down his form as her eyebrow twitched and she leered at him with a gleam in her eye.

"There's a.. very.. naked Fargo in the Warehouse."

* * *

Claudia whirled as Fargo stepped out of the Pete Cave, wearing a spare t-shirt and sweatpants that Pete kept in there for who knows what reason. She raised a hand to her mouth to hide a smile as he nervously tugged at the hem of the shirt that was 2 sizes too big on him.

"So, Fargo. Fargonator. Dougie," Claudia cleared her throat, "what brings you to the Warehouse?"

"Well, I - "

"Hey, I was just playing with little Fargo!" Clapping a hand to her mouth, she stared at him wide eyed.

"Excuse me?"

"No, I mean.. the head.. the bobblehead!" Claudia blushed furiously and rushed past him while searching frantically through the shelves. "Ah hah!"

She proudly displayed the bobblehead with Fargo's likeness to the real thing. "See?"

"And.. why were you playing with mini-me?" he asked, reaching for the toy.

"Um, no reason. Hey look, you have a message!" She whipped the toy out of his reach, and pointed to the blinking phone he was holding.

"Oh, yeah I was about to check it before I got.. zapped." Punching a few buttons, Claudia stiffened as she heard her voice start playing from the small screen.

"Doug! Dougie Doug Doug. It's my birthday, happy 21st to me! I was going to have a party, but everyone left.. again." The video Claudia's enthusiasm dropped.

She grabbed the PDA from Fargo's hands, "Is that the Farnsworth? How did I leave you a message? Oh man, I drunk hacked the Farnsworth? I'm going to be in so much trouble."

"Ahem. Anyway. I was just thinking about you, wanted to say hi and that I uh, I miss you. Okay bye!" The video relay cut out, and a mortified Claudia slowly handed the phone back to Fargo.

"So.."

"So.."

Claudia was rocking back and forth on her feet, refusing to look at the young man in front of her.

"So, you uh.. it's your birthday?" Fargo finally broke the silence.

She nodded, wrapping her arms around herself.

"And you -"

"The coffee!" Claudia bounced the palm of her hand off her forehead while Fargo stared quizzically at her. "The Friends' couch. It makes the most amazing coffee which, not surprisingly, makes you act upon thoughts pulled from your subconscious in the most cliched of ways. I must have called you when I zoned out earlier. C'mon."

She grabbed his wrist and pulled him along behind her. He was struggling to keep up when he finally planted his feet, jerking Claudia to a halt.

"Doug, what the hell?"

"Will you just.. can I just say something?"

"What is it?"

Fargo extracted his wrist out of her grasp, and slid his hand into hers. Drawing her closer, he placed his other hand on her shoulder.

"Happy birthday, Claudia."

She finally met his gaze, and and gave him a sympathetic smile. "Thanks, Fargonator."

Closing the space between them, she pitched herself at him and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"And hey, I missed you too."


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry for the delay folks. I wrote the first 3 chapters all at once, and immediately wrote myself into a block. But I think I'm good, and will try to update once a week. Questions/comments are very welcome. Here we go!**

* * *

Claudia and Fargo walked side by side down the aisles, swapping war stories about their respective places of business. They bumped shoulders, and their hands occasionally brushed which caused one to shyly smile at the other. Fargo noticed Claudia starting to slow down, eventually leaning on his shoulder with her arm wrapped around his to keep her walking upright. Keeping her head on his shoulder, she looks up at him.

"Dougie? My buzz is officially dead. I need a caffeine booster."

"Okay, there's got to be something in here we can use to wake you up."

"No no. Don't need a repeat of the rom-com coffee. Let's go up to the office. We have a normal, boring coffee pot that won't make me call you my lobster," she pinched her hands at him and led the way to the front of the Warehouse.

After getting lost twice, passing the one of the original slabs from Stonehenge at least three times, and one embarrassing trip over her own feet, Claudia finally found the stairs leading up to the main office. Using the handrail to physically pull herself up the steps, Fargo nearly choked when he realized just how short her skirt was. She turned her head to peer down at him, saw where his eye line was, and bolted up to the landing.

* * *

Claudia hoisted herself onto the desk and swung her feet back and forth while she waited for the coffee to brew next to her. She studied Fargo as he wandered around the office, silently trying to figure out how she felt about him being there. On one hand, she was thrilled to see him again and have him here for her birthday. On the other, there's always been a sense of unresolved.. tension between them that seemed to spark at the slightest of looks. She didn't dislike this feeling, in fact it gave her a case of warm fuzzies just thinking about it. But they were both in committed relationships to their careers, and the two states separating them were daunting. However, if she could figure out how he got here tonight, that might be a game changer. Speaking of..

"Hey Doug, what were you doing right before you showed up in the Warehouse? Were you touching anything?"

Fargo looked up before answering, "I haven't found any more artifacts, if that's what you're thinking. I was just about to check my phone, then get dressed."

Claudia tapped a finger against her mouth, staring at him while she thought. He was just starting to fidget when the last of the coffee dribbled into the pot, causing Claudia to hop off the desk and make her way towards the mug shelf. After moving a few around, she found two that she deemed were appropriate. She handed Fargo a mug that had "Fail Safe Activated" printed around it in a type writer font. Peering over Claudia's shoulder, he saw the mug she was filling with coffee for herself had an eerily familiar land mine printed in red across it.

"Did you make these?"

"Heh, yeah. I started printing t-shirts with artifacts that tried killing us, and handed them out as Christmas gifts a few years ago. It's turned into a running theme with us. I made these," Claudia paused to raise up her mug in question, "after our time traveling rendezvous in Eureka. I had planned on sending you one, but.." she lifted one shoulder in a half shrug, "Better late than never?"

She offered the mug to him. His fingers brushed against hers when he accepted it from her.

"Well, now I can think about you every morning, too," he watched her from over the lip of the mug as he took a long drink of the hot beverage.

She raised her eyebrows at him, daring him to continue that thought. When he stayed quiet, she gave a small laugh and hopped back onto the desk to enjoy her caffeine. They sat in companionable silence while they concentrated on their drinks.

"So, Dougie. You beam here often?" Claudia winked at him, then continued, "Unless you've suddenly harnessed the power of teleportation, ahem, quantum particle entanglement, I'm guessing an artifact snagged you."

"I would say that's a fair guess, but which one?" Fargo finished his coffee and set the mug down next to Claudia, "Don't let me forget that."

"Wouldn't dream of it," she smiled at him, "We should retrace my drunken steps from earlier. Since you've.. been on my mind tonight, I'm willing to bet I fiddled with the wrong artifact at some point."

Easing down from the desk, she pulled the chair out from under the desk and paused. With a mischievous twinkle in her eye, she rolled the chair off to the side. Putting her weight on one leg and bending the other, she leaned over to start tapping away at Artie's wooden keyboard. Doug's eyes widened slightly as he cocked his head to the side in an attempt to see more of her pale, freckled thighs. He was vaguely aware that she was speaking, probably about something important. He saw she was pointing at the computer screen, but was having trouble concentrating when there was so much bare skin just begging to be touched.

Claudia turned her head to look back at Fargo, who was starting to list to the side with his gaze locked on her backside. When she cleared her throat, his eyes snapped up to hers and he gave a bashful grin as he quickly straightened his stance. The momentum of his movement caught him off guard, and he went tumbling ungracefully to the floor. Claudia's laugh died in her throat when she heard his head thud on the hardwood flooring. Scrambling to his side on her knees, she ran her fingers through his hair to make sure he wasn't bleeding. Satisfied that he'd live, she looked down into his dazed eyes. He pushed himself up onto his elbows, and shook his head to clear his vision.

"Ow," Fargo's bottom lip stuck out in a small pout.

"We have got to stop meeting like this," Claudia's hand skimmed over his hair one more time, but didn't seem intent on searching for injury. She hesitated before moving forward and pressing her lips against his. Not so quickly pulling away, she rested her forehead against his and gave a happy hum. Pushing herself to her feet, she extended a hand down to the fallen Fargo.

"C'mon, Fargonator. Let's solve this mystery."


	4. Chapter 4

Half walking, half dancing to a tune she was quietly humming, Claudia led the way into the maze of aisles. After mentally plotting the route to where she had found Doug, she slowed down so her stride matched his. She bumped his shoulder and gave him a sideways smile.

"I hope I'm not keeping you from anything.. anyone.. important back at GD."

"Well, I was planning on testing my latest AI companion program," he got a far away look in his eyes as he explained his latest prized invention, "Still working out the bugs, but she's going to be great. Follows the basic program command list, but trying to get her to learn new commands has been rough. Though I can't say I'm surprised, I did model her off of.." Fargo paused for a moment and glanced at the smirking girl next to him, "..an Irish Setter. Easily distracted breed, you know."

"An Irish Setter? You created a canine AI?" she questioned, narrowing her eyes at him.

"Well... sure. Everyone in Eureka does. People get lonely, they want companionship. What more could they want?" he asked weakly, refusing to look at her.

"Uh huh.. And your human companion, what does she think of your robo-puppy?"

"If I had a human companion, do you think I'd be trying to build a fake one?" Fargo shot back, then rethought his phrasing, "A fake dog, that is."

Claudia cocked an eyebrow at him as he stopped walking and sighed.

"I don't have anyone important, at least not in Eureka," he met her gaze, then stared at the floor as he started moving again.

She stared after him for a beat, then quickly caught up with him. She kept her eyes forward, but couldn't keep the smile off her face when he turned his wide eyes towards her as she slipped her hand into his and intertwined their fingers.

"C'mon then, just a little farther now."

* * *

Spotting the floppy straw hat that she had been wearing when she discovered Doug in the Warehouse, Claudia shot forward, tugging him along with her. She stooped to pick it up, and promptly shoved it a top Doug's head. She grinned when his eyes widened and he reached out as if to touch the swirling brush strokes that only he could see. When his hand grazed her forehead, he lightly brushed his fingers down the length of her hair. He slowly pulled the hat from his head, and held it out to her.

"That.. is awesome."

"Oh man, right?" Claudia laughed as she took the hat from him, "No wonder everyone thought he was crazy."

Locating the hat's home among the shelves, she carefully settled it in place and turned to face Doug when she spotted a soft glowing blue light through the racks in the next aisle.

"Oooh, shiny."

She was turning the corner when she heard the distinct crackle of static followed by radio silence. Turning back, she caught Fargo guiltily moving away from one of the shelves.

"Doug.. what did you - " she was cut off by the stilted, yet flowing musical notes of a tango that flooded from the arching cathedral style speakers of an antique walnut radio.

"I saw the radio, and you like music, and I just thought.. I'm in trouble, aren't I?" Fargo stammered as Claudia stalked towards him. He gulped when she nodded.

"Do you remember the last time you were here? If it's been bagged and tagged, it usually means it doesn't involve hugs and puppies!" She smacked his arm. She took a breath to continue, when the song faded into silence. Slowly turning her head to stare at the radio, she cocked her head to the side. The speakers crackled again before coming back to life as a man's voice began speaking.

"Ladies and gentlemen, following on the news given in our bulletin a moment ago, the Government Meteorological Bureau has requested the large observatories of the country to keep an astronomical watch on any further disturbances occurring on the planet Mars."

Claudia quickly cranked the power dial to the off position. Her eyes were round as she pointed to the small digital marquee that proudly announced exactly what this artifact was.

"Of all the radio's to play with, you had to play with Orsen Welles'? Seriously?!"

Fargo grimaced, and began to apologize when a blinding green light went streaking above their heads. The shelves swayed and the artifacts rattled as an explosion sounded from within the depths of the Warehouse.

Claudia threw her arms up in the air, "Oh good! Great! I am definitely getting fired tomorrow."


	5. Chapter 5

Douglas Fargo quietly trailed behind a fuming Claudia. He thought about apologizing again, try to explain that all he wanted to do was listen to some music with her, an activity he knew she was fond of. He wanted to share her interests with her, wanted to show her that he was making an effort here. But he had enough experience with women being mad at him that he decided to wait for signs that she was calming down. She was still stomping a little and her shoulders were tight. It caught him off guard when she suddenly stopped walking, and if he hadn't been studying her body language he would have walked right into her. He watched as she took a deep breath and let it out in a huff, some of the tension flowing out of her in the process. She turned around and looked at him, her boots lifting her just enough that she was level with him.

"Look, I'm sorry I blew up back there. It's just been a really.. weird night." Claudia closed her eyes and ran her hands through her auburn hair. When she met his eyes again, he was relieved to see the twinkle was back. "Besides, I shouldn't be surprised that Dougie Fargo messed with something he shouldn't have."

Fargo took a breath, getting ready to object, but even he knew that he couldn't argue his way out of this one. His mouth quirked into his half smile, and he shrugged a little while Claudia laughed. Taking a step towards him, she slid her arms through his and around his back. Before she could lock herself around him in the hug that she had intended, he made a snap decision and brushed his lips against hers as if asking permission. Her breath hitched in surprise, and he closed the gap between them.

Claudia melted into Fargo's embrace, letting him set the pace for once. When he started to pull away, she made a small noise in protest and nipped at his bottom lip. She untangled herself and stared at him for a moment, her cheeks flushed and pupils dilated. Fargo watched her, trying to gauge her reaction, and determine if he needed to apologize yet again. Before either of them could fill the silence with nervous chatter, she reached out and pulled him towards her again. Her fingers tried to grip his short hair, and she could feel his hands hovering over her waist, still hesitating before touching her. She pressed herself against him and opened her mouth to deepen the kiss.

Fargo, emboldened by Claudia's response, wrapped an arm tightly around her waist while his other hand softly trailed across her cheek, along the curve of her collarbone, and skimmed down the seam of her shirt before lying flat against her back. He took a step forward, forcing her to walk backwards with him until she was pressed firmly against the metal shelving of the racks. Claudia clutched at the fabric of his t-shirt, and arched her back when Doug's fingers grazed the slip of exposed skin above the waistband of her skirt.

Before the couple could go any farther, a second streak of green light blazed above them. It was followed by a third and fourth, all heading in different corners of the Warehouse. The blasts of crashing objects drove the breathless pair apart from each other.

Claudia cleared her throat and adjusted her clothing while mumbling to herself, "Right.. aliens. Never a dull moment in this place."

Quickly searching the shelves, she grabbed the antique radio and tucked it under an arm. She held her other hand out to Fargo and smiled, "This is so not over."

* * *

As they started towards one of the four crash landings, Claudia heard a jingle of metal and a quiet woof. Looking behind her, she saw Trailer trotting along to catch up with them.

"Hey boy, where have you been?" She ruffled the fur around the dog's ears as he reached her side.

The trio walked in silence for a moment before Fargo had a thought.

"So uh, do we know what we're getting into? I mean, you mentioned Orson Welles, which means that broadcast was 'War of the Worlds.' But.. have you listened to the full broadcast?"

"Weellll, I haven't listened to the whole thing, but I did see the movie.." Claudia shrugged weakly around the radio.

"The one with Tom Cruise?" Fargo made a face when she nodded, "I've seen better.

But, if it's anything like the original," he looked over at her, "we might not want to go near what landed."

"Oh c'mon, where's your sense of adventure?"

As if on cue, multitudes of glowing spheres of red energy began to blaze above their heads, weaving across the warehouse from all directions, without any discernible patterns. The bolts slammed into artifacts, walls, beams, leaving only sizzling, melting, burning wreckage in their wakes.

"Or, we could just neutralize this sucker and hope that makes the big bad aliens go away?" Claudia held up the radio, a hopeful expression on her face that quickly distorted into a wince when a bolt blasted into an electrical box near them. With sparks showering to the ground, they watched as the rest of the electrical boxes became targets. The rows of fluorescent lights began blinking out one by one until the only illuminations were the intermittent bursts of crimson. Trailer let out a frightened whine and nudged Fargo.

"We need to get out of here!" he had to shout over the mayhem of the warehouse. Claudia stood in shock, but seemed to snap out of it when he tugged at her hand. Doug took the radio from Claudia so she could grab the dog's collar, and they all started to run towards the front of the warehouse. Dodging falling artifacts and debris, they made their way through the aisles until they found the Dark Vault. Using the move Myka had shown her, Claudia launched her foot at the keypad. The door clicked open as the keypad satisfyingly crunched beneath her boot. Closing the door behind them, she leaned against the cool metal and looked towards Doug and Trailer.

"Artie can't fire me if I'm already dead, right?"


	6. Chapter 6

Making sure Fargo and Trailer stayed against the door, and away from the artifacts deemed dangerous enough to reserve a spot in the Dark Vault, Claudia paced back and forth across the limited floor space between the taped off circles surrounding said artifacts. The two boys patiently watched as she crossed back and forth in front of them.

"First things first. Aliens, bad," Claudia lifted a hand and started counting with fingers as she started listing the facts, "Dark Vault, bad. No electricity, bad. Doug, good," she met his gaze briefly and smirked when he flushed, "Very good. Now, what we need to do..." she came to a stop and pressed a hand to her forehead, "is stop walking in circles."

Propping herself up against the metal door on one shoulder next to Fargo, she crossed her arms over her chest and sighed. She was staring at her feet when he heard her mumble, "I'm sorry.."

"You're sorry?" He cocked his head to the side and his brow furrowed in confusion, "What are you sorry for?"

"This! I mean, this whole thing is out of control, and you wouldn't be here if it wasn't for me," Claudia shook her head and started pacing again, "And I don't even know how I got you here, or if you wanted to be here in the first place, and now there's aliens -"

Doug stepped in her path so she either had to stop walking or collide into him. She stared at him for a beat before taking a breath to finish her thought.

"I'm not sorry," he interrupted her before she could continue, "There's nowhere else I'd rather be. And besides, if you think about it, this is pretty awesome. Y'know, aside from the whole might die thing, but still."

"That seems to be our M.O. doesn't it?" Claudia shifted so she could loop her arm through his, "Consider this my request for a death threat-free date next time."

Fargo froze momentarily at the mention of a date. Before he could come up with a witty response, any response at all, she leaned in to quickly kiss him on the cheek. She bounced away from him, resuming her pacing while carefully avoiding the artifacts surrounding her, seeming to think out loud while coming up with a game plan.

"Okay, so. There's a neutralizing station just around the corner from here. We drown the radio in goo, the aliens go poof, we save the day!" Claudia slightly spread her arms away from her body and waggled her hands for emphasis.

"I always did want to be the hero," the pair stepped in front of the door to the Dark Vault, preparing themselves to leave the unlikely sanctum. Doug looked at his companion, "Ready, Birthday girl?"

Claudia slipped her hand into his, intertwining their fingers. She raised her other hand to the door, pausing to turn and return his gaze,

"Ready, Fargonator."

* * *

Slowly creeping out of the Dark Vault, Claudia and Fargo made their way down the passageways with Trailer slinking behind them. The beams of red energy still flew above them, and they could hear what had to be massive beings making their way around the Warehouse, causing the ground beneath their feet to shudder. The dog gave a low, frightened whine as a shelf behind them exploded, artifacts spilling across the walkway. Reaching a crossroads of the shelves, Claudia hesitated and peeked into the wide center corridor.

"There's a goo station a few aisles left of here," her statement came out in a breathy rush, the only indicator of her nerves, "Shouldn't be too hard to get there and end this. Stay here and I'll - "

"No, no, no. I'm going with you," Fargo cut her off with a wave of his hands, "I got us into this, I can't just sit here and watch you clean up after yet another one of my messes." He straightened his back and didn't back down from Claudia's scowl.

Her frown deepened slightly as she mulled over his words. Giving a short nod, her expression softened as she accepted his determination.

"Well then, now or never. Let's get this over with."

Turning back towards the main aisle, she inched out into the open, leading the way towards their destination. They kept a slow but steady pace, stopping only to crouch down and shield their heads when artifacts and debris threatened to collapse around them. Claudia was so focused on moving forward, she didn't see the stray blast of red energy heading her way until she felt Doug yank her backwards. Stumbling over Trailer, they landed in a heap of tangled arms and legs. Extracting herself and rolling off of him, she lay flat on her back for a moment and taking a deep breath. Her nose wrinkled and she turned her head towards Fargo, who hadn't moved from his spot on the cold concrete.

"Do you smell burning hair?" Her eyes widened as soon as she spoke, and her hands flew to her head to slap out a smoldering lock.

Doug shifted so he could get to his feet, then held his hand out to haul Claudia up next to him. The force of momentum caused her to pitch forward against him. With his hands on her hips to steady her, she reached up to encircle her arms around his neck and lightly pressed her lips to his. Pulling back, she gave him a wry smile.

"Just wanted to make sure I got to do that at least one more time," she gave him one last kiss before letting go of him and faced reality again.

As they finally reached the neutralizing station, Claudia let out a breath she didn't realize she had been holding. She planted the radio on the floor and grabbed the hose, aiming it towards the offending artifact.

"Might want to cover your eyes, Dougie," she warned while clamping her own eyes shut and squeezing the trigger. When nothing happened, she cracked one lid open to peer down at the radio. It remained untouched on the floor, with the hose hanging limply above it. She watched as a single drop of goo dripped from the hose and landed on a speaker with a fizzle of purple mist.

"That.. is so not what I want to see right now," Claudia shook the hose as if it could sense her frustration. Throwing it down with a defeated sigh, she fought the urge to stomp her feet.

"So!" Her hands came together in a sharp clap, "How about that plan B?"


	7. Chapter 7

Fargo watched as Claudia restrained herself from panicking in the middle of the corridor in front of the lifeless neutralizing station. He stepped close to her and put his hands on her shoulders, giving them a light, reassuring squeeze.

"The goo is pumped to these stations from a central location, right?" he quietly inquired. She nodded her head in a flurry of shining copper hair. "Why don't we just take the radio straight to the source?"

"Okay. Okay, yeah that's a good idea," Claudia shook herself slightly and took a deep breath, "See? This is why I need you, you can talk me down from the ledge." She returned his signature crooked grin with a shaky chuckle.

Moving over to a terminal installed next to the station, the tech savvy girl tapped a few keys, the screen booting up with a flash of brilliant white in the dark, and pulled up a map of the Warehouse. "Hah! Let's see them mock my reasoning for hooking these babies up to the back up generators now," she murmured to herself, then glanced over her shoulder and beckoned Doug to get closer.

"So we're here," she pointed to a cluster of 3 white dots on the gridded map, ""We need to get from here.." she traced her finger through the maze of aisles to a large expanse of space near to the top of the map, the back of the Warehouse, "to there, the Goo-ery."

"The.. Goo-ery?" Fargo's breath tickled the exposed skin of Claudia's neck, sending a shiver down her spine.

"Also known as the Neutralizer Processing Center, but that's not nearly as fun to say," she explained while memorizing their route.

Sliding out from between the terminal and Doug's presence behind her, she poked her head into the aisle long enough to make sure the coast was clear. The ground violently lurched beneath their feet, causing the metal structures to groan in protest. Artifacts shifted, rolled, and fell from their homes. An ornately painted vase narrowly missed Fargo as it hurtled past his ear and shattered at his feet.

"Well, a good day that would not have made," Claudia commented, skirting around the fragments of jagged ceramics. As a murky turquoise vapor coiled into the air above the wreckage, she snagged Doug's hand and tugged him into motion, "That's our cue to skedaddle. Let's not stick around to see who the guest of honor is."

With the radio tucked against her hip under her arm, Claudia watched the young head of Global Dynamics out of the corner of her eye while they zig-zagged their way through the Warehouse. He had been quiet, not that he was an overly chatty fellow, nor was this the ideal situation for conversation, but she sensed something was on his mind. She was mulling over how to approach the topic when he beat her to the punch.

"Is it always like this?" his face was upturned, watching the swaying shelving units and the continuous laser show above them, the flashes of red light silhouetting his features, "I mean, do you guys ever have quiet days, or is there always a disaster to avert?"

"We get the occasional reprieve, but there's usually an artifact that needs to be collected somewhere. They don't all threaten humanity, but we have our fair share of catastrophes," she was quiet for a moment before she sniggered, "There was this one time that Pete and Myka got body swapped, 'Freaky Friday' style. Now that is something that I would've paid to see. Although.. if they hadn't snagged the artifact, they would've melted together.. and then exploded. So scratch that, it's pretty much always like this."

Claudia attempted to shoot Fargo a happy grin, but it fell short when she saw he wasn't looking at her, his lips slightly pursed as if he was deep in thought. She must have blinked, as he was suddenly staring at her, his eyes boring into hers behind his glasses.

"Y'know what I can't get over?" she startled slightly when he spoke. an amused smirk slowly emerged from the intense scrutiny of his stare, "I keep thinking, 'What kind of crazy person would want to work here?'" Claudia sucked in a breath at his phrasing and broke eye contact to stare behind him. She was willing the tears not to spill when he reached up and touched her chin lightly, bringing her gaze back to him. "And then I think I'd gladly be that crazy person. I would run away from aliens every day if I got to run away from them with you."

Her mouth hung open as she gaped at him, his words sinking into comprehension. Seeming to snap out of her stupor, she clamped her mouth shut with an audible click of her teeth, then launched herself at him. The radio bounced away at their feet, forgotten, as she tightly curled herself around him while he vibrated with silent laughter.

"I hate you so hard right now," her whispered voice wobbled near his ear.

Fargo shifted in her grasp so he could wipe away the wetness on Claudia's cheek that she would adamantly deny was there.

"Liar," he kissed her nose with a loud smack.

A new wave of artifacts clattered down from the shelves, and a sharp yip from Trailer reminded the duo that they had a mission to accomplish. Claudia reluctantly let go of Fargo and wiped at her nose with a snuffle.

"I don't know about you, but I think I'm overdue for a vacation," she stooped to pick up the ancient radio and glared at it, "A vacation far away from the Warehouse"

"We're almost there, right?" Fargo spun in a slow circle, taking in his surroundings, "These aisles are all starting to look the same to me. How do you not get lost all the time?"

"You get used to it," She placed a hand on his back when he was facing the correct direction, "And yeah, we're almost there. Look," pointing to a softly glowing window not too far ahead of them, she gave a whoop and rushed ahead of him.

Doug was following behind her when he saw the stray bolt of energy heading their way. Stumbling as he tried to catch up with her, he reached a hand out as he shouted to her, "Claudia! Watch out!"

He stared in horror as time seemed to slow down. Claudia whirled around to face him, her auburn hair fanning out around her face. A radiant smile meant for him transformed into a gasp of alarm as the glowing crimson bolt slammed into the metal shelf inches from where she had been running. Time sped back up as she covered her head with her arms to shield herself from the shards of destroyed artifacts and splintered shelves that began to rain down around her. The backlash of energy swept her feet out from under her and she collapsed, quickly disappearing as the ruins continued to cascade around her. The dust was beginning to settle as Fargo finally reached the pile of rubble that Claudia was crumpled in.

"Claudia?"


End file.
